You are a Colossal Bitch!

You are a Colossal Bitch!

That was the phrase said to me at a rehearsal once. I can still hear it. I can still see the rehearsal site. I remember every single detail of that day. It doesn't matter where or who, but that's what a color guard instructor said to me when I was perceived as not trying hard enough. The reality was that I was trying and was already very aware of my errors. I was already beating myself up, but they saw it differently. They saw a person who wasn't trying or not living up to their potential and I paid the price through verbal abuse.

This post is about how we talk to performers, how they perceive us and if we aren't careful, how our outer voice becomes their inner voice...for life. Today I see color guard members I taught back in my twenties and almost want to beg for their forgiveness in how I ran rehearsals, spoke to them, and some of the things I made them do. I was young. I didn't have anyone telling me I was wrong and was simply repeating a pattern of what I saw as a performer. I was a part of a world championship team and success was gained through tough coaching and at times, emotional abuse.  Kids don't need to be coddled, but most definitely don't need to be berated. They assuredly need to be encouraged. I don't think we do that enough as youth coaches. I know I didn't when I first started out. Sometimes I'm so caught up in getting the show finished or the phrase clean, that I forget that somewhere in count 8, are kids looking for me to lead them. They watch me and they hear me. They feel what I say.

The adolescent brain is not developed at the level the adult brain is and a teenager's perception is often based on emotion as opposed to logic. This is where much of their drama comes from. This is where misinterpretation happens. Often what an adult says is misinterpreted, because kids respond to emotion first, while we as the adult are trying to use logic. It's a skill that adults need to acquire if they want to be effective while coaching teens. What we say, how we say it, our tone, and our body language is all up for interpretation and is important. The performers we teach see themselves in us and their self-esteem is based on how we respond to them.

"You are a colossal bitch!"  To this day, I can still hear the tone as the phrase was yelled out.

The words we use are crucial. It's beyond important here in 2016, where we now know more about psychology and the human brain than ever before. I follow coaches of all types and in sports I don't even like. I enjoy learning how great coaches get their players to perform by what they say and how they say it. Some, I completely disagree with and I don't care if they are coaching an NFL linebacker or major league pitcher. I don't care if they just won the Final Four. Berating, humiliating, and throwing tantrums are not just unprofessional, but out right abusive. They are foolish. One of my favorite coaches comes from a sport that I actually dislike. His name was John Wooden and coached basketball at UCLA. He once stated that you need to find little ways to show your players that you care. "Small gestures make a big difference," he said. He won multiple NCAA titles, but his life as a coach was one of compassion and for which he is known. He believed in building cooperation, enthusiasm, team spirit, and confidence as a method for success.

"You are a colossal bitch!" This is NOT a method of building confidence.

Confidence. Think about it. How well do you build confidence in your performers? Really think about it, because we all can't be the greatest color guard instructor of all time. Sometimes we are amazing designers, but terrible motivators. Some of us are incredible technicians, but awful leaders. Some of the best choreographers are the ones we've never seen or heard about, because they stay behind the scenes and let their performers do the speaking for them. Some only coach at the local level, because that's where they know they can make the greatest difference. Going national is not important to them. Not everyone can be a nationally renowned designer or technician, but we can all be better coaches. Many, if I'm being honest, are simply what the rest of the world would call an abuser. Isn't it amazing how in sports, abuse is tolerated and often celebrated if you show enough success?

So I write this today to ask you to look at your coaching style, and ask yourself what your outside voice is telling the inside voice of your performers. Are they overweight? If so, it is most likely a given that they are concerned about costuming. They probably struggle with conditioning. How do you approach that? Are they tall and somewhat awkward? Are they they only male in your program? It must be hard for a boy to actively engage in the performing arts, while managing the male testerone of the high school scene. What about the one girl who doesn't have the same skin color as the rest of the guard? What we say matters and how we show an understanding that each performer is unique and valued, speaks volumes to our success. 

When was the last time you said these phrases?

Great job. It's getting better.

Let's come back tomorrow and get even better. 

I'm looking forward to seeing you tomorrow.

I care about you and what happens to you in your life.

I know you're struggling. I see progress. 

You can point out errors and even become angry without name calling, throwing things, and using your power as a coach to control their mind through fear.

What about the pat on the back? When was the last time you went to that one girl who is shy and uncomfortable in her body and walked up behind her on the field and said, "You are doing great. Keep it up." What about the girl who can't throw the toss with the rest of the guard or the one that learns her choreography slower than the rest? Have you told her that you see her trying or see her progress? By doing this we aren't building weak humans who can't handle life, we are building young adults who grow to become parents, professionals, and coaches who take our activity to the next level; filled with empathy and compassion. With each new generation we learn a little bit more about coaching. The stories of throwing music stands, water bottles, and name calling sound barbaric and ridiculous in today's world. It's because we now know what was happening was abuse. It's because we are growing and learning as a society. We have more information today. We take from other sports and other coaches and learn. Do you remember how Bobby Knight from IU threw chairs and tantrums and we as the public ate it up, as if that was how you lifted an athlete to their potential? It is now frowned upon because really, who in the hell has ever gotten better out of fear over compassion? When I was in the Navy and attended boot camp, I expected to be yelled and cussed at, because that's what I thought happened. That's not what happened. The military learned that yelling and cussing does not create a better soldier and does nothing for retention. They changed and grew. 

I am not a colossal bitch and never was. I believed it, though. I look back and I wonder how that day influenced my teaching. I wonder how it impacted my self-esteem. I wonder if at any level it impacted my string of bad relationships, especially the one that hit me and the other one that told me I was worthless. When your coach, the person who is supposed to be the believer of you doesn't show that they believe in you, then you will believe the worst. I often wonder what would have happened if that person had ever asked me how I felt about myself as a performer. If they had, they would have found that I was a perfectionist and was very hard on myself, as most world class performers are. 

I sometimes want to call that instructor who called me a bitch and tell them that I can still hear their words in my head. I'm still haunted at times when teaching others and am very aware of how I may be perceived by the kids I coach. There was a time when abuse was celebrated as a means to success. This was before science allowed us to understand the impact of abuse on the human mind and psyche'. We lacked the knowledge of how the brain works. We weren't aware that men and women have different societal influences that create who we are on the inside, thus creating a difference in performers. We didn't know. Now we do and there are no longer excuses for not bettering yourself as a coach.  I don't care if I'm liked by the kids I'm in front of, but I do care if I reach them. I care that my words resonate with them on an internal level. I care that they leave me as better people. I do care that they know I care, even when I  raise my voice for impact.

What will your voice be as you head to your next rehearsal?

Drum Corps and My Late Night Jim Croce Album

This is for my Atlanta friend. 

I have an old Jim Croce album I found in a back alley record store years ago and sometimes late at night I pour myself a glass of wine, turn the lights down, and play that old album, while enjoying the peace it brings to hear the honesty of the guitar played through each crack of the needle to the record. If it were up to me, everyone would have an old Jim Croce record so for a brief moment, we could all feel something of total bliss. If you close your eyes you can hear the words that are untarnished by technology and media. You can see him sitting on a couch somewhere in solitude playing his guitar and singing, "There never seems to be enough time to do the things we want to do once we find them." Jim Croce's music is music that makes you feel something. He speaks to love and life. His words are simple, but they aren't ordinary. If you let him, he reaches into your heart and speaks to your soul.

I just returned from my yearly trek to Atlanta. It's the one drum corps show I get to see every year and I always come away from it with something I need to say. Maybe it's the inspiration from the shows or maybe it's the lifelong friendships or maybe it's the memories I hold dear from days gone by. I'm not sure what it is, but each year I certainly feel poetic after that show. When it comes to drum corps, I don't follow along like others do all season. I like to watch the shows with a fresh perspective, untainted by others opinions. This year though, I was fortunate enough to see the shows in Nashville the night before Atlanta. I took my nine year old son and 69 year old mother. It's refreshing to sit with people who don't know "the sheets" or know the history of the corps. My mom gets to see about one drum corps show every eight or so years and my son...well this was his first. He's been to WGI and countless winter guard and band shows, but this was his first summer show. If you ever want to see the activity in its purest form, watch it with a nine year old. What a nine year old sees is very different than what we see. A nine year old has an opinion that is natural and based on feeling, as opposed to intellect, but don't be mistaken in that. A child forms opinions and can speak to concept and costume. They just respond by emotion first and intellect second. A nine year old see's drum corps with their soul before their brain. It's how Robin Williams encouraged us to view poetry in the Dead Poets Society. Throughout the show, my son shared his opinions through his immediate reaction to the moment. He didn't analyze the guard work or technicality of the percussion. He could have cared less about transitional moments. He just simply enjoyed the shows for what they were and he found that he had some favorites and some not so favorites. He loved...LOVED...the Blue Devils. That shocked me and I'll tell you why in a second. His second favorite was the Madison Scouts. After they finished, he turned to me and said, "Wow mama! Wow! That was loud!!" I asked him if they were his favorite and he said, "Oh no. I liked the Blue Devils the best." I asked him why and he said that they looked like a Broadway play. He said they were weird. He said that they were fun. Those were his reasons and then he said that he wanted a tee shirt.

I really liked the Blue Devils, but more so on an intellectual level. I spent their entire show analyzing it and to be honest, I didn't get it 100% in its intent and I don't really know anyone else who did either. Josh however, didn't care. He didn't try to get it. He just simply experienced it. Driving to Atlanta the next day I realized that is what most of us old timers do. We analyze the shows until the very essence of art is sucked out of them. I don't completely blame us...the audience that is. For so long at the national level with WGI, BOA, and DCI...so many teams force us into intellectualism over emotionalism. That's blatantly clear at Independent World Finals for WGI. The books and shows have become so "artistic" that many times the designer has forgotten that art is supposed to move us. Art should make us feel something. As human beings we want to feel something. Human beings want to laugh. We want to cry. We need to cry. Reflection and the need to reflect is another human emotion we don't always give enough credit to. Anger and love. Sadness and happiness. That's what art is ultimately supposed to do. It is to make us feel. Our need to express gets suppressed so often by a world asking us to think way too much.

When I left Nashville for Atlanta, I hadn't really formed an opinion on any of the shows. I would wait for Atlanta to do that. I thought about Josh on the way up and his reaction reminded me of my Jim Croce album. Jim sings a song called Operator. It's one of those songs that everyone with any human soul can say they have experienced. He was left by the one he loved and calls to speak to her, but decides that he's better off without her.

Operator, well could you help me place this call
'Cause I can't read the number that you just gave me
There's something in my eyes
You know it happens every time
I think about the love that I thought would save me

Oh my those lyrics. Who hasn't wanted to have Jim Croce playing that on guitar in the background while we laid in bed at night crying our eyes out over the love we lost to another? The lyrics. The guitar. It makes me reflect. It makes my eyes water. You see, when we listen to music in the silence of our homes, we let it wash over us like the ocean Josh saw with the Blue Devils. I decided that when I got to Atlanta I wouldn't analyze anything. I would watch the shows in the way I listen to Jim Croce or the way a nine year old experiences music. I was either going to like it or not. I was going to absorb the colors and engage in the sound. I would analyze nothing. Ironically, I found that little experiment was harder than I thought it would be, but as the night went on I got better at it. When I did that, I found that my favorite drum corps were not necessarily in the top 5. I let the Academy make me laugh. I let the Blue Coats take me to what I saw as the coolest playground ever. I experienced a western shoot out with Crown. I listened to the Scouts in a way that made my son say, "Wow!" At times I closed my eyes and just listened. 

When the night was over, I found that I didn't really know who did what in terms of guard work or the best drill. I didn't care. To be honest, once I let go of the idea that the corps have become so homogeneous to the point identity is no longer a driving factor for many, I was able to relax. Once I decided to not judge, but enjoy...I found the art inside the intellect. I found that my favorite corps was not first or second or even third. It was Santa Clara. Oh my how I loved that show. The word I used at the time was "lovely." It was simply lovely. They did a show that was somewhat simplistic in concept, but in no way simple in its presentation of the four seasons. That concept has been done...and done...and done...and done. They however, had a way of conceptualizing it so it made you feel something special as the seasons moved from spring to summer and summer to fall, but you had to let the seasons happen, just like the leaves change and fall from the trees in the autumn.  I barely even acknowledged Santa Clara the night before. The night before they were just a show about the seasons. In Atlanta, I saw art and I saw it in the form my nine year old son saw it. As I watched the show, I thought of the many seasons I've spent in Atlanta with WGI, BOA, and DCI. The before show drinks and after show conversations are many. I thought about how many performances were held in that dome and how many people missed the artistry being presented, but I also thought of the moments designers missed to move an audience, because their version of art is hidden within ego and competitive drive. I will certainly admit that I've missed a moment or two, because of my need to "judge" the teams surpassed the need to feel. I thought of my friends and the special moments we've had in Atlanta at the Omni and through conversations in parking lots around the dome. I thought of the thousands upon thousands of kids that have walked into that dome as an artist, but left the audience feeling let down as we couldn't get out of our own way as an activity and just let them be the art. I thought of the times when I dropped my guard and let myself just feel love through the friends I hold so dear. It's the same love I have in my old music albums that take me into a realm devoid of politics, intellectualism, and the weight of all that is wrong in the world.

I attend a lot of concerts and plays. I have a ritual in the moments leading up to every event. I drink a glass of wine, listen to the music of the band, read about the play, or listen to an interview with the artist. I try to get in a mindset of art. I love art. Being originally from Music City, I especially love music in all of its forms. I let it flow over me like Josh let drum corps flow over him Friday night. So, I can't help but wonder what happens to us that doesn't let us enjoy the art of pageantry. We all admit we appreciate it. We value it. We see it,  but I'm not sure many of us truly see it for art that makes us feel. While sitting in the dome, I wondered what the placements would be if a poet was the only judge and the only criteria read, "Make the audience feel." I wondered who would win. I wondered how the poet would rank and rate. My guess, is that the poet would throw out the rating, throw out the ranking, and just enjoy the night. She would come home and write verse upon verse of her experience. She would put on some Jim Croce and let the night speak from soul to paper, without thought. She might hear him sing, Walkin' Back to Georgia.

I'm walkin' back to Georgia
She's the only one who knows
How it feels when you lose a dream
And how it feels when you dream alone

She might come home and think about an old friend or two and look back on the trip as the sheer joy it was with all of its laughs, conversation, and love for something that has been a part of her life since she was 14. She would think of the community she is a part of. She would think of how it has made her a better person, because the art made her feel as in this classic verse that will stand the test of time.

If I had a box full of wishes and dreams that had never come true. The box would be empty, except for the memory of how they were answered by you.

I write this for all of us out there who crave to feel, crave to love, crave to touch, and crave to be human.

A Young Woman's Body Image--A Basic Primer for Guard Instructors

I remember every player-every single one-who wore the Tennessee orange, a shade that our rivals hate, a bold, aggravating color that you can usually find on a roadside crew, "or in a correctional institution," as my friend Wendy Larry jokes. But to us the color is a flag of pride, because it identifies us as Lady Vols and therefore as women of an unmistakable type. Fighters. I remember how many of them fought for a better life for themselves. I just met them halfway.--Pat Summit

It's band camp time. Thousands upon thousands of kids across America are taking to the marching band field for the very first time. Those in the color guard are holding this odd thing called a flag pole. Many are stretching and finding muscles they never knew existed for the first time in their young lives. Others have never taken a dance class...much less been asked to leap, jump, and move across the floor with grace. Most of these kids who make up the color guard are girls. They are young women who just a couple to three years ago got their first period. Their breasts are still developing. Here are some other things you should know and consider, before the first ensemble drop spin is  even attempted.

• In 2008, the CDC reported that 36% of high school girls reported strong and persistent feelings of sadness and hopelessness in the past year. 19% seriously considered suicide, 13% made a suicide plan, and 9% actually tried to kill themselves.
• Female athletes experience concussions differently and take longer to recover
• By the age of 5, children have absorbed a cultural bias against overweight people and females take the brunt of this bias (Musher-Eizenmean, 2003)
• The media is a multi-billion dollar industry aimed at shaming women into being unrealistically thin, unrealistically beautiful and unrealistically super human.
• The CDC reports that approximately 17% of adolescents are overweight or obese and the lower the income, the higher rate of obesity.

Finally...

Did you know that according the the Geena Davis Institute for Women in Media, only 31% of all speaking roles go to women? Only 23% of all films feature a female protagonist. Only 23% of all action films have females speaking in the films and almost all of action films have set the male up as the hero. This is why movies such as the new Ghostbusters and Wonder Woman is so freaking important. This is why the movie Frozen was so groundbreaking. She chose her sister over a man. She was not an evil queen and she empowered herself to use her internal strength. Oh and one more thing. Women highlighted in sports in the movies and on ESPN are less than 4%. Less than 4. Freaking. Percent! Intelligent women who are portrayed strictly for their talent and brain are visually hard to come by on television and in the movies.

Why is this important? Why did I start with it? Because, by the time you get these girls to spin their first drop spin, most of them are dealing with some sort of self-esteem, body image, or inferiority complex that you can never see, they might not even be aware of and it goes back to the beginning of time. We as women have a long history in this world of subjugation that we are just now coming out of. In fact, our right to vote is still less than 100 years old. 

When you coach a female you have a responsibility to them as women. Now this is no different than any youth you may coach. Males are just as important, but for this post we are talking about females, because females make up the majority of all high school color guards in this country. Without any proper data on the pageantry arts, it is probably the single largest sport for girls in the country. I have and many of those I know, have taken immense pride in our activity that we...for the most part...take the girls that many won't, because we take all shapes and sizes. We give them a shot at the 50 yard line solo. 

So here's the problem. When you coach a guard with the pure intent of designing a show and getting a score, then you lose the reason the girls need us the most. When your focus is only on the design of your amazing costume, then you may forget to design to body image. When you put your emphasis on design over proper training and conditioning, then your females lose out on possibly the one opportunity life has given them to pull themselves out of this pit of hell called the objectification of the female body. When your single goal in life is to choreograph equipment phrasing better than Crown...(well first of all good luck with that), then you have made it about you and not them. Here is something else. Teenage girls are not you. They do not have the wrist strength of a man or self esteem of a developed woman of power. How you speak to them and build their sense of self is more important to those girls than your costume design. How you condition them...if you even do...not just builds their strength to achieve your not so good Crown Guard rip off show, but helps them respect the health of the body for life. YOU are building life long habits. You yes you! It is not just that early is on time and on time is late. Their self esteem and health will be with them until the day they die.

Does this mean that we don't push them to be better every day? Absolutely not. Have you ever heard of the sandwich approach? This is a phrase coined by Dr. Robert Smith that states that when we make a correction, we will get better results by commending the effort first, addressing the technical mistake second, and encouraging future progress third. This technique is not just an idea. It is a well researched method of coaching that yields higher results in performance than just yelling. Athletes and performers are waiting for the negative comment, but what makes this method effective, is that most athletes are already beating themselves up for the mistake. They are mad at themselves for not performing up to par, letting the team down, and most importantly letting the coach down. So why beat them up again? A compliment on effort goes a long way to building the trust in themselves to try something new. Remember, if the stats are right and these young women are walking into your program doubting themselves, then basic psychology would naturally dictate that the emphasis on the positive effort is more effective than the negative.

"Oh but Shelba...kids today are so soft. Back in my day our coaches carried pistols and shot our hands off if we dropped." Oh, but reader...keep an open mind to science and psychology and try not to scream, "Get off my lawn to the kids on Halloween."

Here's something else to think about. Women have had their bodies objectified by the media, men, and even other women all of their lives. "You aren't thin enough. You're too athletic. You're too fat. You're hair isn't blonde enough. Your skin isn't soft enough. Look at your body. It's so sexy. Your breasts are so supple. Your ass is so round. Your ass isn't round enough." Think about the messages these girls have been seeing and hearing their entire lives.

"Here little Suzy. Here's your first Barbie Doll. Oh and by the way...don't forget that you will NEVER, EVER look like her."

"Oh look at how beautiful your daughter is dad. You're going to have to lock her in the house until she's thirty." 

The messages are real and they have detrimental impacts. When girls stretch in front of their male staff for the first time in their lives in a second position, with their legs wide open...it matters. When we have them bend over to stretch out in front of the band...it matters. When we put them on the ground to work leg stretches, while their legs are in the air...it matters. When we put them in uniforms that are too tight...it matters. IT MATTERS and there are easy fixes, such as how we ask them to dress in rehearsal. Some girls need more time to anesthetize or get comfortable with the idea of a second position stretch. Some need more time to acclimate to a world where showing skin in a rehearsal setting is common. Also remember, at least one of your girls if not two by statistics, state they have been date raped. Giving an option of rehearsal attire that covers the top parts of the legs around the thigh area helps in the acclimation process. Some of your young women may have never worn a sports bra and need encouragement to wear one, because all women participating in high impact sports should be wearing breast protection. It helps in their becoming comfortable with their growing chest and reduces soreness after practice. Only a woman can truly know this, hence the reason for this blog post. And one more thing...when costuming girls, please think of the large breasted girls. Fashion designers screw this up all the time. Most of us simply are NOT a B cup with a tiny waist.

Finally, I would like you the reader, the coach, the director, the designer who is reading this to consider how you approach punishment in terms of exercise. We need girls in this world to exercise for life. We need them to love exercise as to cut down on a number of diseases such as diabetes, breast cancer, and high blood pressure. Exercise for conditioning and health is a much better approach than exercise for punishment..not to mention that if you yourself are overweight, eating french fries and barking orders from a tower...all you are doing is building a guard that doesn't trust you. Put the fries down and pick up an orange and tell them to do the same damn thing. 

When I coach I have a simple philosophy. It took me years to grow this philosophy. I had to go through the yelling phase, ego phase, and arrogance phase. I'm now in the "leadership" phase. I want to lead them to lead others. I want them to love who they are, because it took me way too long to love myself. Sometimes it takes domestic violence, sexism in the workplace, and being called a bitch, cunt, whore, and tyrant to come to the realization that you are none of those things. I am and you are a strong, powerful, unstoppable, and once in a lifetime woman. My philosophy is to build young women who know who they are faster than I ever did, so finding that man who hits and berates them is not even an option in their lifetime.

Coaching women is an undertaking that if done right can build leaders of our country. Standing in front of them is an awesome responsibility and part of that responsibility is the undoing of generations of women being told they aren't good enough. It is your job to say, "You are good enough. You are a leader. You will make it. I believe in you."

NOTE:

The Marching Roundtable is producing a series of podcasts focused specifically on how to coach young women. They are also putting in place a mentoring program and diversity program. I encourage you to check out their site to sign up here to mentor young women or men, so we can start building coaches, directors, and designers who know the how of the young people and not just the what.

Dear Band Director...

An open letter to all of the band directors out there from you guard staff. 

Dear Band Director,

I am your guard instructor. I want to tell you a little about myself. First I want to say that with me, you have hired a professional. I was unable in college to major in color guard like your percussion instructor or woodwinds section leader. For my education, I had to start learning my craft in high school and then carry that into different realms of development through winter guard, drum corps, and even dance and acting classes. I may have a degree in education, psychology, or engineering, but I don't have a degree in color guard. This however, does not make me less intelligent, less educated, or less knowledgeable about the section you have hired me for.

I know that you have hired a drill writer. You might have even hired a designer or program coordinator to help you build your program to a level of excellence, that is competitive on the national music stage. I want you to know though, I am also a designer. I have ideas about what show should be chosen and how that show should be staged. I have ideas as to what equipment should be used and where. I can also fix the drill if we find it isn't working. You know what else I can do? I understand music. I can read it and my sensitivity to musicality allows me to create moments of beauty we call art.

I am a coach of young women and men. In the way I talk to them and coach them, can make or break their self-esteem, body image, and absolute enjoyment for their future in the activity we both love. It can even make or break your program. I can hinder and stall the success of your bands name just by my decision to NOT make your program a priority. What I have to know to make your color guard successful ranges from the mechanics of body conditioning, dance, equipment fundamentals, performance techniques, judging score sheets, an understanding of staging, components of colors and even the building of props. My very expertise can impact your General Effect, Design Analysis, Guard Caption, and sometimes even your music caption if just one judge decides to venture out of said caption. I am a professional.

I know that you have spent a lot of money hiring drill writers, music arrangers, and consultants that come to your band class and teach the nuances of music. You hired me, too. You want me to teach a daily class. You want me to stay up late at night designing costumes and then ordering those costumes to precise measurements, that will allow beauty to flow from the performers bodies just by the very essence of the way they stand on the field. You desire to hear, "...and in first place for color guard is...your guard." With that first place score will most likely come with high marks in general effect and ensemble analysis.

When the design company you hired has been paid their final check and your music consultants have flown back home...I will still be here. In fact, I will most likely be planning for the winter season on top of the planning for the fall marching band season. One thing I realize in color guard, is that we as an activity have failed in the promotion and advocacy of the training of proper conditioning, certified dance teachers, and even certified technicians specializing in the use of equipment. I know that you realize that there are guard instructors out there who have failed in keeping with their end of the bargain. They used the activity as a stepping stone to their ego. Some have even been fired for misconduct with students. Some are in jail. Some have been caught stealing funds from the guard itself. We know this happens. It also happens on your side as well. Our activity is fraught with issues of accountability. This however, does not make us all unprofessional and uneducated. I am not a neophyte to this activity, nor am I corrupt. I have honed a skill that is unmatched by the sheer way I've learned to lead young women into excellence beyond the pageantry arts. I am building the performers to be leaders of the nation they are about to inherit. Am I worth the money, when we take into account the absurd responsibility you have handed me night after night after night?

This is what I ask in return. I ask that you respect my work as much as you respect the work of the design company you hired for $10,000 that raped the till of finances for your day to day guard staff. Without proper pay, I cannot dedicate my time fully to your program, as I have bills to pay as well. So I will have to split my time, find a full time job, or just simply fit you in when I can. That is not what I want to do. I want to build a program and not just call it mine, but call it ours. To do that, you have to trust me. You need to include me in the design side of the program and not just hand me drill charts and say, "Here...write." I would like to be included in the pre-season...very pre-season discussions on show concept. I'm not an afterthought. I should be the first thought. You see, in this activity and in many, many programs, the design of the show and who should design that show comes first and those that will be around to bring that show to life comes second. I need you to reverse your thinking. One...this will cause you less stress. If you put the correct day to day staff in place...people you trust...people who are professionals and who can grow your program together, then the design will come easy. Programmatic issues will be handled in house and with less stress. It's easy to write a check. It's a lot harder to build a team and a team is what will make your program successful in the end.

There are no quick fixes and easy answers. To build a program takes dedication and decades. When your day to day guard staff is a second thought or the bastard child in your mind, then we will leave and move on. Your band will become just money to us. The reality is that you can hire the best names in the country to design your show and arrange your music, but without me...that great design becomes average and forgetful. Your first thought should have been, "Who will train my color guard to be the finest in the nation?" You would expect nothing less from yourself as a band director in front of young musicians, so why would you expect less and pay less and communicate less and trust less of your guard staff...We who are your day to day staff. We are the people who are in front of your guard, mostly young women, and the kids that are trusting you to bring in the best, as they stand with a flag in their hand waiting to hear the words, "...and 5,6,5,6,7,8."

We must not forget that with the very way I add nuance to effort changes in let's say the slight tilt of the head, in a moment when that one note, from that one soloist is heard off in the distance; I could make an audience weep. I can make them laugh by the way I train for performance. I can bring your show to life. I do bring your show to life! So I ask you to consider all of this as the nation begins band camp and the start of the fall season. Who is more valuable to building the name of your program that the community will cheer for as your band loads the buses to some far off show to earn trophies to be shown on the local news? Who is there sweating and laughing and crying with your students? Is it your day to day staff or the far away designer who posts pictures of their feet by the pool, while they write your drill and calling the kids in your band...dots?

Never forget that we know the names of every kid and they are more than just dots to us.

The Very Essence of the Term "Technician"

What is a technician? What does it mean? The text book definition for our practical purposes in the activity states that a technician is an expert in the practical application of a science, art, or craft. Let's see if I can make sense of this. An expert. This would mean that a technician for a color guard would need at the very minimum an awareness and demonstrated proficiency in the areas of conditioning, dance, muscular dynamics, performance concepts and equipment principles. The practical application of color guard is the demonstration that the technician has the ability to coach youth with intent, while using modern teaching principles. They would need to exhibit that they understand behavior modification for the coaching of sports to achieve the highest results. This expert in turn for their diligent hard work, would show results in the realms of competitive success, growth in membership, retention of veterans, and increased success following the current class structure the program exists in. Meaning, the program will get better each and every year.

Now, that is just the general job of a technician. What if they write choreography? What if they have to change drill when there is a mid season glitch a judge pointed out at a show? What if they are the person who makes on the spot design decisions, when the chief designer is only on staff as a contracted employee who is seen maybe two or three times a season?

Now, what about the technician who is at rehearsal every day, every show, football games, parades, and concerts? What about the one who has the skills to clean the show from the perspective of all captions including, but not limited to General Effect, Ensemble, Music, Movement and Equipment in general? What if this person has the skills to help write the show? 

Think about it. What is a technician in today's high paced, highly competitive, and high priced world worth? If you were the band director or director of an independent guard, how do you calculate the cost of a designer at let's say...50% the staff budget, while the rest of the staff fight over the other 50%? What do you think happens to morale, commitment, and desire to grow as an instructor? What do you think happens to the desire of a technician to stay and build a program if those in charge of the money choose to put their technical role below that of the other side of the sheet? When you look at the sheets in any of our pageantry activities, I often ask, "Which side is more important? The what or the how?" Because dammit, there is no what without the how. They don't exist separately and we need to start paying a hell of a lot more attention to those whose jobs are to make the what come to life through the expertise of the how.

With all this being said, if how equals the what, then why do we as an activity spend more resources focused on the what? 

Let me give you some examples. Drill writers. How many drill writers out there are writing 20 and thirty and 40 drills over the summer for marching bands all over the country without once stepping foot on the field of the band they wrote for? How much is that drill writer worth over the most talented technicians on your field? "But Shelba, if it wasn't for the designers, you would have nothing to clean." Very true. I can't argue that point. I'll offer you this though, "Without the great technicians of the activity, your design can't flourish and you won't be able to put your name on this program." I mean come on people. We all know that when a designer lands one great band or winter guard gig and if that band is successful, they in the end puts their name on it. Because it's the designer that wrote it right? However, what if that brilliant technical staff walked off the field in mid-October and said, "Clean this shit yourself." Would you want your name on that program then?

Here's another one. Choreographers. I once looked at a budget that had a separation of designer, writer, and then technical staff. The technical staff were at the bottom of the pay scale. I looked at the staff budget from a percentage stand point and realized that the line item percentage for the day to day staff was significantly lower than the percentage for one designer and one choreographer to come in and wave their magic design wands around. This my friends, is not uncommon in our activity. The phrase, "We need to hire such and such to boost our programs standing in the pageantry community." (fill in the blanks of someone you pay to put their name on your program for saying that blue would be a good uniform choice)

Well...this is what I say to that. BULLSHIT! Spend the bulk of your budget and hire a brilliant technician who has the skill set to work with an average designer and writer, whose job is to set a three year goal and move your color guard/band up through the ranks...then build your budget around that brilliant technician and your staff around them. What would happen? Maybe, your program would grow so well, that you could then hire the big named designer to put their name on your program to just say the uniforms should be blue. Simply put, what if we reversed our thinking all together?

"But Shelba, we can't find any good techs who have the skills of what you are talking about." Yes. I would have to agree with that statement....maybe. A great technician is NOT a dime a dozen. Not everyone can clean a well written phrase with the finesse of breath, musicality, and effort changes necessary to reach the pinnacle of the how. Or is it, that you have ignored the how and the people that do the how for so long, that no one wants to work with your program anymore. It also could be that your people are actually pretty brilliant technicians, but you refuse to pay for their services so they put your program on the back burner and come in when they can fit you in. I've done it. If I find out I'm working for a program where my services are undermined or devalued, I will stay for the kids...to a point, but I will start the process of moving on and that may come in the form of moving completely to another program or moving your program to the back of the line and I'll fit you in when it works for my schedule. Why do I do it? Because designers and writers most of the time won't design page one for free. So why would I do the same as a technician and as a woman? We do this activity for the kids, but I won't be used and no one should ever feel that way.

I have another example. Local circuit and national focus clinics. I would love to know how many go on each year all over the country that say, "Hey guess what you guys! We are paying this great designer to come and teach you how to design a great show." The fine print of that clinic or workshop says, "By the way, we'll teach you how to design, but we won't teach you how to clean it. We won't offer workshops on time management, coaching with intent, or cleaning for effect." The fine print of that workshop will be so small that you won't even realize it's not being offered. The result, is a lack of attention to the importance of the technicians of the activity. 

Why am I writing this today? It's because I received an email from a band asking me to consult...for free. FREE.  Let me say that again. FREE. When I gave them my price they told me they didn't have the money. They had already hired a drill writer, but the drill writer is expensive. My response? So am I. "But Shelba, you don't write drill or design world class shows." I don't? Have you ever seen me or any other expert technician work THEIR magic? Have you ever seen me take a mess of design and rework it to make sense? Have you ever seen me clean efforts into a phrase written without the thought of musicality? Have you ever seen me kick total ass when I've been given one day to write and clean an entire song for a show, when the drill came in late? I'm that good and so are many, many others.

I have one more. Oftentimes, so much money is spent on the production value side of the show, then when it comes time to pay for the day to day staff, all that's left over is money for a young, inexperienced person with no resume to speak of. Costumes, silks, props, floors, make up, hair, designers, and writers all make up the what. When you budget first for the production of the show, without figuring out the day to day staff who will make sure the make up is worn correctly or the silks go around together, then my friend...your program will ultimately remain average and forgettable. You will spend your time wondering why staff turnover is so high and you can't ever seem to make it to the top. This pattern will set you on a path of bitterness and the feeling as if it's everyone's fault besides yours. 

"The staff don't care."

"The boosters don't want to pay."

"The judges are bad."

"The kids never practice."

No...those are excuses. The reality? No one wants to work for you because you put the what before the how.

The moral to the story...Start paying your technicians equally and in time we will see more devotion to programs and more experts will come out of the wood work who make the what truly come to life, because they will devote their time in the activity in honing a skill that is valued both financially and visually.

Beyond the Confetti Cannons and a Sold Out Arena

It's that time of year again. It's proposal time. Now I'll be the first to admit that in my 20 plus years in the activity I've only submitted one proposal. Proposals I submit, if I have anything to say, occur at the local level where I feel I can make the most difference. Most of the time I do what most of us do. I sit back and watch to see what happens. I'm not afraid to put in proposals, I just can't be there to defend my ideas and I don't want anyone speaking for me. I think there's a lot of people out there like that. I also don't get a vote. I'm allowed to speak my peace...any of us can speak our peace...but not all of us can vote. Actually, most of us can't vote. This year however, I do have something to say and the really great thing about this new age of technology we are in, is that any of us can take to social media to voice our concerns. We can write blogs and create petitions. News travels at the speed of light and secrets don't really exist anymore, when those at the meeting can text those of us not at the meeting. This past weekend, I got to listen to and participate in a pretty heated discussion about the WGI proposals that specifically impacted the A Class. Many different voices were heard and many of us had little fear in expressing our voice. At the end of the day however, I don't get a vote as to how MY A Class guard is treated at the national level and most of the people in the room don't either. Our trust is in those representing us, who often have conflict of interests. I don't get a vote in how WGI spends MY guards money and I don't get a vote on where MY guard performs. I don't get a vote on what age the A Class should be capped. Whether it's the age of 20, 25, or 45...I still don't get a vote and to be honest...no one ever asks me or my colleagues before many decisions are made. So with this, I would like to spend this post voicing MY opinion on the proposals and as they make me say at work on my Twitter account...

"The opinions expressed in this article are mine and solely mine and don't represent any organization I work for."

Every year it seems that the proposals at the WGI level take on the same tone. They are worded differently, but always seem to have similar ideas. How will we seed prelims and semi-finals? Are we going to change the age out rules? How many do we take in finals? Who should or should not get promoted and how will that happen? Who should be allowed to judge a power regional? Can the World Class drop flying turkeys from the ceiling on their abstract idea of great sitcoms of all time, to an obscure piano concerto written by Prince?

It's seriously a circle without end and each year most of us sit back and wait until the middle of summer when the board meets to find out how our individual color guards are impacted. When writing this article I found that I wish I could go and reference past proposals and tally up how many different ways we have seeded nationals and changed who makes finals and why. I wanted to find out how many different times we have discussed the age out rules. Mostly though...I wanted to find out how many proposals comprised the A class; voted on by the World Class. I don't have that information though and my guess is that no one has that either which is a shame, because I bet history would tell a very interesting story. So, I offer a recommendation.

Stop making decisions that impact the A Class, without first testing the waters through "well written" surveys, feasibility studies, financial impact studies, or a well planned A Class caucus. Wait a year or two while you study and pilot new ideas. Create greater transparency when making large sweeping changes that impact most of the activity. Right now WGI has a perception problem. The perception is that many...MANY...A and Open units feel disenfranchised. Many feel that in recent years the World class is hijacking the activity for reasons that vary depending on the person you speak to. This year for example, many guards felt screwed by being at Millet Hall, as well as having finals at the Nutter Center...back to back to Open Finals. I have yet to find anyone who thought that was a good idea that isn't on the World Class Board, but I speak only for myself. I'm sure those people are out there somewhere. Many people are questioning whether or not there was a financial gain or loss to the system this year. Many people are wondering why the world class has a semi-finals show that takes place in the arena, when there really isn't a justification for said show.

What's interesting is that when you look at World Finals, everything seems so happy and good. The confetti cannons are fun. A sold out arena, with undeniably amazing guards. Is it, though? Is everything good or is it getting a little harder to survive both competitively and financially each year? When you look beyond Saturday night, what do you find? Do you find well trained judges and guards at both the local and national levels? Do you see an increase of safety concerns as we increase skill base at the lower levels? Do you see a stressed out A system with too many units travelling on small roads to Millet Hall or to Cincinnati? Do you see an increase of young people instructing in a world where risk has increased? Do you see an arena where police officers are screaming at young people, because the arena no longer fits the activity it serves? Do you see a trust in the system or have we turned a blind eye to those that built the activity from the ground up? 

When WGI took away the age out back in the late 90's (ish), many people felt we would lose the youth aspect of the activity and we did to an extent. I don't think any of us could have seen though, how it would filter into the A class in terms of the yearly incremental increase in skills expected and demanded as the A Class started to populate itself by highly designed and expensive shows taking its lead from the now ageless World Class. I don't think anyone could see how the demand in skills would then filter down to the local level Regional A units. When the rule was changed to allow for 40 individuals allowed on the performing floor in the World Class; many people saw that by giving the World Class and extra 10 people, then good kids would get sucked away from the Open and A units, where many of those kids might have gone; thus impacting the Independent A bottom line as well as their skill base. Additionally, I'm not sure anyone has truly asked the A and Open units if there was an impact? We then took away one thing that all of us certainly love. We took away the arena. Now some people say that this was done to accommodate the A Class units ability to serve more guards in finals...maybe. I'm not sure that's it though, especially when you look at how World Class guards get a semi-finals show, without a significant number of units to truly warrant a semi-finals event and if we were to be honest; Why 15 in finals in World Class? The numbers don't truly warrant that either. However, the answer for that will be that everyone wants to see World and no one wants to see A or Open. (I wonder about that as well) People would say that it's World Class that draws the guards in. Is it? I've also heard that the World Class guards can now only fit in the arena since they write for the arena only...and by the way...they aren't the only ones who write for the arena. To be honest...I don't know the truth and no one seems to know either, as the answer is different depending on who you ask on the Board. I will tell you though, the perception of it all looks bad out here in the real world. 

So I'm forced to come to a conclusion. It seems that we have a history of increasing the benefits for the World Class, while eliminating the benefits for the lower classes...to accommodate the World Class. If I'm wrong then I'm wrong, but perception is a bitch isn't it? I also must conclude that the activity at both the local and national level is growing too fast for the system we have. The arena, city, and system is no longer working for the amount of units we have nationwide. We can't even come to a conclusion as to what A and Open Class should really look like. Hell...we don't even discuss it openly. We probably have too many guards coming to Dayton. We might need to look at capping it or placing a score that you must reach before you are truly eligible. We may need to look at another city. We may need to look at putting World Class back on Sunday. We may need to look at moving A Class to a completely different weekend. We may need to look at starting on Wednesday. We may need to look at a complete restructure of the Board of Directors. (now that's scary isn't it?) I hear a lot of people complaining, but the real problem is not this faux issue of how we seed semi-finals or whether or not the A Class should perform on Friday night. If we want change, then we have to look at change over the course of time and not from season to season and be willing to change. You can't make a change with a multi-million dollar organization like WGI, without taking into account the entire make up of the activity. The issue we truly have, is a city we've grown out of and an activity that has grown up that reacts before it studies. It is not just international, but being touted as a reach into China. China? We can't even fix our home yet. Do we have the capacity to expand at the rate we are expanding? If I could write a proposal and be in Vegas this weekend to defend it; it would go something like this.

Let's cap all proposals and expansions for two years, while we hire an outside and independent consulting firm to take the pulse of the activity through a well designed and totally transparent study of the bylaws and make up of the Board of Directors and all affiliations. The financials of the activity will be scrutinized for waste and Board approval of capitol expenses, staff raises, and raises in membership dues. It will look at the education process for new board members, judges, and instructors. This study will take a hard look at the make up of the Independent Classes in terms of who is designing, teaching, and performing. It will analyze data and survey/interview staff. The study will look at local guard budgets and talk to circuit boards to find out about what works and what doesn't work. Judges would be interviewed without fear of reprisal. Scholastic unit directors and instructors would be interviewed; along with their parents to gauge the impact of the financial and rehearsal burden on the family unit. There would be a strong look at the diversity make up of leadership. The independent research firm would then submit recommendations for changes going forward.

Financial Impact: A lot, but a hell of a lot cheaper than this constant revolving door of changes in how, who, and where we compete; along with a stronger base of trust throughout the nation.

This however, will never happen. I'm living in a dream world, because we all know that if my proposal were to pass, then we would all have to sit back and wait to see what came back. I work for the government and I see it all the time. "Let's spend a million dollars, because this looks cool without testing the waters of the public first!" People want "it" and they want "it" now, regardless of long term impact. However, there are some really great nonprofit's out there that do what I'm proposing about every decade or so. They look at where they were, where they are, and where they are headed. They put the breaks on, before moving forward. It's simply smart business.

In the end, many of us might not like what is found and the changes recommended, because change is hard. Everybody would lose something and in the end we might find that A Class is best suited for the Nutter Center or we should completely remove A class from Dayton all together, but at least we would know. We might find the bylaws and Board make up no longer fits this international activity of ours. I ask this all the time as I live in a data based world...Wouldn't you like to know what is really happening out there by the numbers? Wouldn't it make you feel good? It's comforting to see real studies independently done and not independently done by a friend of a friend of someone that marched in the activity? A true independent study. There's a peace to it. However, that peace comes from mature thinking and the understanding that all stakeholders would have to make some hard choices and then live with it. 

I'm willing to give it a shot and try, but I know as I write this I'm in the minority. We should never fear change, especially when we as an activity are growing so well. In the end, we should all want what's best for this wonderful activity of ours and right now what is best is taking a breath to assess before we respond.

To All Parents As We Start A New Marching Band Season...Let Us Do Our Jobs

Let the band director, guard instructor, marching staff, and music staff do their jobs!

Here's where this post comes from.

Last night, my son who is 9 years old played in the first play off game for his baseball team. Josh is an average player. He's a really good hitter, but can't catch a fly ball, if the ball was lobbed at him from one foot away and by his 92 year old great grandmother. I love my kid, but I don't see a future for him as a baseball star. I didn't sign him up to learn the skills of baseball. My goal and my only goal has always been to teach him the lessons of what it's like to play on a team and follow rules. Everything else to me is secondary. He has been playing for three years and over time I've seen him go through a number of changes. Some good and some bad. However, I make sure he learns from all of them. I've been watching Josh for years in a number of activities...mostly karate and baseball. I've learned that at his own detriment, he is a perfectionist. He gets angry when he doesn't get things right the first time and sometimes acts out. He has gotten in trouble at karate and baseball. When I was his age I was a gymnast and acted the same way. I acted that way when I transitioned to marching band and acted that way when I transitioned to drum corps. No one was harder on me than me, but it doesn't excuse poor behavior and poor Josh has inherited my perfectionist and anal retentive competitive personality. He's going to have to learn and it will be a hard road for him I have no doubt. However, he will learn.

Last night, Josh struck out at bat and in a fit of anger at himself...threw the bat. That is a big no no in little league baseball and the first thing that happened was that the umpire gave him a warning. The second thing that happened is the coach lowered himself to his level so he could talk to Josh eye to eye and told him that throwing the bat is against the rules and could hurt someone. He then added this phrase, "...and it makes you look like an ass." I heard this. A mom sitting next to me said that she couldn't believe he said that. I told her that I think Josh deserved it. Later on after the game, the coach apologized to me profusely. He went on and on telling me that he just got angry and that is what he would have said to his child. My response, "It does make him look like an ass. Thank you."

I signed my son up for baseball so he could learn what it is like to Not Act Like An Ass In Public! So why would I at any level not back the coach up? I don't care if my kid is 9 or 19. If you act like an ass, then you need to be told that you are acting like an ass. I'll be damned if my kid grows up thinking that the rules don't apply to him and that his little temper tantrums are acceptable behavior. My child is not special and no one else's child is either. In the car, I told him that I was proud of how he played the game, but wasn't proud of him throwing the bat. I told him that I supported the coach. There will be no mixed messages in my household. I then told my husband. He being dad and an e-Army sniper made sure Josh knew that wasn't o.k. behavior in his own "ex-Army sniper" sort of way. (No he didn't shoot the child)

So I write this today for all parents signing their children up for the up coming marching band season, but this could go for the parents signing their children up for football, soccer, volleyball, dance, or theater.

The first question you as a parent should ask is this. "Why is my kid doing this activity and what do I hope they learn?" We as coaches and staff members should ask the same thing. "What lessons do I hope to teach this year?"

If the first answer is, "I hope we win or I hope they learn how to play music or I hope we design the best show ever," then the answer is wrong. The answer should go something like this.

"My hope for this marching band season is for my child to learn discipline and with discipline comes rules and consequences. I hope my child learns that sometimes consequences come from others on the team...as well as the coaches. I hope my child learns that although he is an independent and strong individual, that adults still set the guidelines and he needs to follow them. Period. I hope my child learns what it is like to work as a team and with being a team comes winning and losing as a team. My child is not special on this team. I hope my child learns to understand that in life comes disappointment and he may be on the receiving end of unwarranted and unfair disappointment, because welcome to the real world. I hope my child is not coddled, because life doesn't coddle you. In fact...life is damn hard. Life will eat you up and spit you out without warning. Life demands that you have a thick skin and that skin is grown in the hot sun under the watchful eyes of a good coach telling you that it isn't good enough and you need to do it again. I hope that at some point this season my child learns the lessons of karma. If you put good toward the team, then good will come back to you. If you put bad toward the team, then bad will come back to you. I hope my child learns that when you practice hard you reap the benefits and when you slack off, complain about the heat, the rain, the sun, the long hours, and the physical pain...then you go to the back of the line of those teams that don't complain about the heat, the rain, the sun, and the long hours. I wish for my child to learn to manage time, because early is on time and on time is late...and if you're late...you're dead. I want the staff to come down hard on my child sometimes, because he will learn what it's like to be a good employee and to basically...shut up and do what you're told. I want my child to know that in life his opinion is not always asked for or desired. In fact, I can't think of the last project I had at work, where my boss gave me a choice on whether I wanted to complete it or not. I hope through working as a team and under coaches; he learns how to have a valid opinion, but learns when it is appropriate to share that opinion. I don't want him to be a opinion-less drone incapable of forming an opinion, but I also don't want him to be so arrogant that he doesn't know when to just shut up and just listen. I hope my child learns to think abstractly and creatively, because he has to find new ways to work through problems and hard situations. I hope that my child cries because it is too hard and celebrates when he sees the fruits of his and the teams labor. I want my child to know that he is valued, but at the same time not valued over anyone else on the team. Finally, I want my child to have fun, because fun is so much more important than winning, but winning is a blast and if you work hard...you might just win. I want my child to make new friends from different backgrounds and learn that diversity is a good thing. I want him to learn to stand up for those weaker than him through the inner strength he gains by a strong and personal work ethic; taught to him through marching band. I want my child to take the lessons of the team and carry them into school, college, marriage, parenting, and the work force. I want my child to shine, but at the lessons of what it's like to be a team...not because his is a star. My hope as a parent is that I can back up the coaches, directors, and instructors in any way possible to help my child learn these lessons of life."

This is my hope for my child as a parent and as a guard instructor my hope for those I coach.

Don't Believe Your Own Press...Paradigm's Story

During my career in non profit and about a decade ago, I worked at one of the premier substance abuse treatment companies in the country. It is safe to say, that the company I worked for "owned" the industry in Florida. Working in that environment made it easy to forget how hard we had to work to keep the doors open and to keep our name in the public eye. Every three months, the CEO would gather all of the managers together for a leadership meeting and she always started with this phrase, "Don't believe your own press, for if you do, you will surely fall."  Companies all over the world use that phrase as a reminder that at any time, you can fail by the simple belief that you are unbeatable. In the real world, you often hear of athletes, actors, artists, entrepreneur's and businessmen fall, because somewhere along the line they believed their own press and didn't pay attention to the climate around them. Color guards are no different.

How many guards have we all seen come and go and somewhere in the process of many of those programs, there is probably a story where the staff didn't pay as close attention to the money, the membership, climate, or process as closely as they should have. Paradigm is no different and our story is one of caution and the climb back. It's one every person can probably relate to or at the very least learn from.

In 2005, Paradigm reached the height of competition as a program by placing 7th in World Class at the WGI World Championships by displaying one of the hardest and to that point one of the most standard setting flag features ever. By completing the entire phrase with our feet and in the horizontal position, it was by standards of the time a true test of the world class sheet. In the midst of the season and looking back, it was very clear that the staff hung our hat on that moment and even the program. For us, it was truly a Cinderella season, but in the midst of it all we started to believe our own press and lost who we were as a program. We believed that we had arrived and with that feeling comes arrogance. Below are just some of the mistakes we made.

• We didn't take the pulse of the emotions and sensitivities of the performers in our quest to push the envelope
• We believed that because we were a two time World finalist, kids from around Florida would just flock to us
• We didn't assess if the program was moving too fast for the financial structure
• We didn't assess the veteran status of the performers and who would come back and who wouldn't simply based on time in the program and time to move on
• We didn't assess the stress level of the staff
• We didn't assess our competitors competitive growth and proximity to us
• We didn't assess the national climate

These are just a few things we didn't assess. How do you build upon one of the best moments you've ever had? We didn't ask that question. If I remember correctly, we didn't ask a lot of questions. We moved into the next season with a simple assumption that everything would just work. We believed our own press and it backfired on us. It took us two more seasons to realize that success is fleeting and if you don't continue to spend the majority of your time focusing on the administrative side you will eventually fall. By 2007, the loss of a significant amount of the membership, and low turn out at auditions resulted in the decision that 2007, would be our last season as a program. 

The staff scattered and it took us five years to realize that we needed to be back together, but in 2012, we still didn't do it right. Once again, we believed in our own press, no matter how old that press was. In today's world of social media, texting, and the internet, it's important to realize that five years ago is a lifetime and five minutes ago is all that really matters. 

That was lesson number one.

Social Media has changed the way we recruit, communicate, and even train color guards. It is probably without a doubt the most significant shift in the way the color guard world works. Every thing you say and do is there for the world to see.

Lesson number two

The second mistake we made was that we wanted to rebrand ourselves, but in the branding process we threw out what worked and kept what didn't. We completely did it backwards. The one thing that has always worked for Paradigm, no matter whether or not we have had a good or bad season is that the staff is truly one. We act as one and function as one. We are never off message as an organization. The trust is strong. We thought that by shifting the staff around that we could rebrand, but still be Paradigm. Wrong. When we did that we lost the soul of the program.

Keep what works and know what doesn't work. Take ego out of the equation.

Lesson number three

After a disastrous 2012 season, we attempted 2013 and realized that there was no way we could come back out without a plan. After a disappointing audition and difficulty securing the right staff, we made the decision for the second time in our history to fold the program, but this time, would only be temporary. We would spend the 2013 season planning. In December of 2012, what would have been a design camp, we met as a staff and brought in a few outside opinions and spent two days hammering out a strategic plan that would expire in April 2016. At the end of 2016, our goal was to walk on the floor in A finals. I can only speak for myself, but at times my ego got in the way as how do you go from World Finals and a standard setting, standing ovation moment, to making a three year plan to make finals in Independent A class? I struggled internally with that.

Let you ego go if you want to save the program. It's about the program...not about you.

Lesson number four

You have to figure out how to re-brand and rebuild without living in the past, but keeping the spirit of the tradition alive. 

In the two days of strategic planning, there was much debating, arguing, and at times some storming out of the room. We had to agree to drop blame and leave the past behind. This was hard, because it was the time that we had to agree that yes we screwed up and yes we should have paid more attention to the dynamics of the program, but there was no one person that could be pointed to that owned that blame. This was when we discovered that we truly were friends, that everyone owned a stake in the program and doing that allowed us to put Paradigm first.

Lesson number five

When you strategic plan, it's crucial that all voices are heard. Opinions matter and dreaming big is a necessary step. Strategic planning is a concept of starting big and ending with realistic short term and long term goals. It takes commitment by all involved. We were honest with each other and all agreed to specific tasks and were held accountable for those tasks. 

Listen to each other no matter how crazy the idea's are and brainstorm as a group.

Lesson number six

When we started the planning session everyone was given an assignment. "Write down the companies you feel have the qualities you want to see in a color guard." There was no wrong answer. Starbucks, Target, Fed Ex, the Rays Foundation were all mentioned. Comments such as, "great customer service" and "efficient" were just a couple of reasons those companies were mentioned. The question was also asked in reverse. "Who do you not want to mirror?" We discussed other guards and drum corps that we respected and didn't respect as organizations. We made a list of qualities that we wanted and did not want as an organization.

Family, financially viable, unique, community, open door policy, and advocates were words frequently used.

Don't reinvent the wheel. Learn from others and take the most necessary qualities you want to see in your organization.

Lesson number seven

Setting goals was the crucial step. Once we decided who we wanted to be, we needed to decide what type of competitive organization we wanted to be. We knew a couple of things. We would have to be patient. There was no rushing to get back to World and we were willing to take as long as needed to get the right kids, staff, and financial backing into place. Nothing was going to replace the foundation that the kids come first and our goal has always been to be a place where any performer can feel at home. Patience allowed us to look at the financial picture with open eyes and invited new ideas from other creative and business outlets. 

Be patient and build your foundation. The finances, staff, and performers need to grow as one entity and not separate aspects of the program.

Lesson number eight

In the process of strategic planning we did what is called asset mapping. We made a list of every color guard within driving distance. We looked at their staff's. We looked at where the kids were gravitating to and why. This was a long process, but helped us identify where we should be located and how we should recruit. It taught us to not waste time recruiting from certain area's and helped us reach out the the right staff members. It helped us find our niche' area. This then helped us look for rehearsal facilities and find a community to "own." One of the most crucial pieces of Paradigm is that we believe that a color guard, band, or drum corps should find a community to not just exist in, but to be a part of. Community is what started this entire activity to begin with and we made a goal as a group that we would return our program to the roots of the activity.

Look at your community. Do they even want you there? How can you work with the community to gain their support? 

Lesson number nine

Mentor and succession plan. This was the next step. There was no way that Paradigm would exist with the current staff structure. We realized that it was time for the older staff to serve as mentor and consultant and the younger staff needed the opportunity to step up to design, tech, and administrate. So that's what we did. We created a succession plan. The goal was to turn the program over to the right young people and make it theirs. We vetted staff carefully for not just skill, but to make sure their philosophy fit our philosophy. Most of the current staff have performed in the program before, but not all. Outside experiences are crucial. Moving staff positions around was also crucial to this plan. We had to find where the best fit was for all involved.

Once you reach the top, it's important to send the elevator back down. Mentor those invested in your program and give them the chance to be successful under their name...not yours.

Lesson number ten....MONEY

Money was not going to be left to chance. In no way, under any circumstances were we going to function in the red. We would fold, before go broke. We also knew we would not exploit the performers for dues. Keeping the dues manageable, while staying competitive was our biggest goal. We knew that making money outside traditional fundraising means was a necessary component to keeping Paradigm afloat and making money just to survive was not an option. So we laid out every idea we could think of to raise our public profile, write grants, and raise money in the non traditional sense. We worked it like a business first and color guard second. Let me repeat that.

We function as a business first and color guard second. It's the only way to survive in the long term and everyone on staff is required to understand that.

In the end, our taking the 2013 season off  to assess the climate and write a strategic plan, was the best thing we ever did. That one weekend in December 2012, set us up for walking on the finals floor in Dayton in 2016. The current strategic plan has expired and it's time for another one. We will follow the same structure and invite outside voices to the table. All opinions will matter. It was a long road back to the finals floor, but the biggest lesson we learned is that we will never again...believe our own press. We will assess and assess and assess. We as staff members ask the kids to always look at their rehearsals and shows to assess their performance and our philosophy is that we as the adults should also as well. See you on the floor in 2017. Who knows where the next strategic plan will take us??

What I Have Learned About the A Class Sheet by Spending Three Years Teaching Independent A Class

I have no clue. Looking for answers along with the rest of the A class community, most judges, administrators, and performers. If you have any, please contact me at Shelbaparadigm@gmail.com

The Greatest Love

Some things change, they never stay the same. Life goes on and as the old adage states and many who come of age headed to the downward slope of their lives; you can never go home again.

Dayton not the city, but what we call WGI is the epitome of the cliché’ of just about every life quote, motivational poster, and famous poet that ever spoke of the struggle of life. The city of Dayton has gone through many transformations and as much as things change, some things have stayed the same. For instance, the roads in Dayton have been under construction for well…ever. What are they doing? The Hara Arena for example, where many of us practice and many of us premiered our first shows back in the 90’s is still cold as ice as it’s well…an ice rink. Edwin C. Moses Blvd is still there and that exit is a big deal for those of us driving down from the airport on our first day in Dayton. For those coming from the south, it’s the witnessing of the Cincinnati skyline for the first time coming over the bridge. The planes to Dayton are filled with kids in guard jackets. That will never change. There is Needmore Road, South Patterson Blvd. and the Denny’s. The Denny’s? Yes the Denny’s. It’s the hell hole food many of us have eaten after hungover from Saturday night. I was shocked to see that they closed it. Now it’s just a memory of once was. That piece of crap, bad service Denny’s was one of our hangouts. The Marriot. Next year at this time it will look completely different. Al is still there. Al. He is the bartender that has worked headquarters for a decade. He is just as much a part of the WGI experience as the guards themselves. Every year Al tells me that I’ve added wrinkles around my eyes or I look haggard. I love Al. He tells it like it is. He makes me laugh and knows my drink without pause. He’s the consummate bartender.

It always rains in Dayton. Always. It always seems to rain in Dayton at the most inconvenient time for the guards. This year is snowed. We’ve seen snow, but this was new. We were covered in it. I slid on ice driving to A finals at the Nutter Center. I was like, “Damn…I certainly want to live to see finals.”

Things change and they can never stay the same. There’s no use in holding on. Life is like that. Those of us who are old are desperate for the past and those who are young don’t even grasp it. They just want to move forward.

I guess this is what brings me to the point of this post. It’s important that life moves forward and we as an activity keep evolving and growing and changing, but this year there was something missing and many of us old timers’ seemed to feel it. We couldn’t put our finger on it, but throughout many conversations in many different arenas, many different people and many different cocktails; I’m going to try to pinpoint it.

We feel…we the people…we some of the people maybe…feel that tradition has gotten lost in the income generating empire WGI has become. No one and I mean no one wants to go back to a time when only 100 guards came to Dayton. We love seeing a sold out crowd on Saturday night, but we want some of the aspects to never get lost in the rush for money, marketing, and advertising.

I’ll start with this. Lynn Lindstrom. The First Lady of WGI. Her picture should have been hanging in every arena, in every city. Her tribute should have reached to Cincinnati to Millett Hall and the Marriot. Wouldn’t it be nice to see tributes to guards of the past in the form of pictures or old clips, because we are all here today, because Anthron did something really weird back in the 80’s or Alliance came out of the tunnel with tents and a gypsy show. We are here, because many of us were forced to age out and teach at the age of 22. We are here today, because Ernie announced the guards and his voice was truly something special for those of us striving to reach finals. We are here today, because people sat in board rooms, bars, and circuit shows trying to find new ways to give the best experience to kids. There is no single person that owns the activity. We all do. We feel that…no not we…I’ll just say I, because I don’t believe in speaking for others. I feel, that we are losing our traditions and that they are being swept to the side like some glitter left over after a New Year’s Eve party in the race for whatever gains income.  

I felt awful for the A class guards. They pay their dues, work just as hard and populate the entire activity at the local and national level, yet this year it just wasn’t the same. Part of the tradition is the tunnel. Kids for years have worked just for the privilege of walking down that tunnel. Some years you make it and some years you don’t, but trying to get your props down the tunnel without losing control of them is something everyone should experience at least once. That little side room is another tradition. What it looks like though, is that the World Class now owns the arena and just happens to give it up on Sunday morning, because they are tired. It wasn’t lost on many of us that Independent World went on at night in the arena every day of competition. It wasn’t lost on most of us when the predictability of few people showing up for A finals. That was a shock…not. Did the kids have a good time? Of course they did. However, Friday night use to be theirs. We use to even give them Triple Finals on Saturday and the World class went on Sunday. Now both Open and A go on back to back Saturday morning. That makes me sad. I overheard a WGI staff member at Nutter complaining that they weren’t working the arena. See, even the contest staff would rather be at the arena.  That actually made me cry, because it sounded as if we were second class and for many of us it’s the contest staff’s faces from our local circuits that makes us feel comfortable at WGI. That’s a me thing I guess. There is nothing more special than seeing that kid who walks on the floor at A finals for their very first WGI. Nothing! I also must say that there isn’t anything more special than watching a young instructor get to experience it as well. I wonder though, if we are losing it all in the quest for more.

Things change I guess. Being in Dayton for A and Open is hard. It’s hard to plan for and it’s a constant level of stress involving much travel, to multiple cities, at absurd wake up calls. We do it though, because we want our kids to experience Dayton. We…no I…understand that the activity has grown and we most likely have grown out of Dayton, but I know it has to grow. I know it can’t be like it used to be. I mean this year there were police monitoring the hallways at the arena. Not security. Police. One of them yelled at a kid in the hallway for just standing….and he yelled. It’s just not the same when we need police for crowd control. I don’t think I liked that, even if the insurance company did require it.

I don’t profess to this day understand why the activity has become a classical music, piano concerto, wine and cheese toss fest. It has though. I made a joke during finals and said, “Oh my God could someone come out and just do Beyonce’?” When I got in the car to come to the airport on Sunday, Beyonce’ was on the radio. I laughed. So o.k. Piano concerto’s it is. When they changed the age out to no age out many years ago, many of us complained. Many complain to this day, but there is no denying the athleticism, talent, and skill that comes from 30 year old adults who have honed their skills over a lifetime. I still like watching the kids, though. The real kids. It makes me happy. It’s my thing, I guess.

I remember when the judges could hang out at headquarters and weren’t sequestered. I get it. It’s the world championships. I can still miss it, though. Those judges are our friends, colleagues, and sometimes family. We never get to see them anymore and many of them are even afraid to speak to us. I feel that we’ve created a divide and somewhere along the line, WGI has lost the voice of the people, the ones who don’t sit on the board made up of World Class guards and those of us that don’t earn shares at the end of the season after all the dollars are counted. There is an overwhelming feeling of us vs. them…people are just afraid to speak it out loud. Someone used the phrase this weekend that the 1% now truly owns the activity as we watch percussion commercials between shows. We have to make money to grow. We all understand that. It’s how we are sustained. However, I do have to ask this. Doesn’t  A Class and Open Class sustain us at some level? I mean there’s only about 50 or so World guards. Let’s be honest here. I’m no mathematician, but somehow the math doesn’t work. I guess the advertising dollars are so great it really doesn’t matter. I don’t know. I do know regardless of the math, that the A class pays into the system at a much higher rate both locally and nationally. There is just simply more of them. Everyone pays their entry fee’s. There were 200 A Cl;ass Guards at WGI this year out of a total of 350 or so guards. ( I think I counted 346) So what is that…58% of the entire world championships? O,pen Class comprises 28%, so total the Open and A teams and you get roughly 86% of the World Championships and the argument is that it’s the World Class that sells out the arena. No one debates that, but it doesn’t change the percentages, because if even half of THAT 86%, chose not to attend, then the tide would most certainly turn.

When WGI announced the movement of A class to the Nutter Center on Saturday morning many people complained. I advocate for a living and in advocacy 101, you always learn to look at who is speaking and what interests they hold. You find the conflicts of interests and in that particular case, there were many. How many guards should go into finals? I don’t know. I guess 25 and 20 is a good number. It makes sense. It does. How do you make it happen with 350 guards? I have no idea. I know that using five facilities must be a logistical and expensive nightmare. I do think though, it was a rushed decision that didn’t really look at the impact it had on the crowds and the general feeling of “Well, that sucks. We no longer as an activity have an option to see all the finals performances if we so choose.” We all suck it up though, and move on. A decade from now no one will remember that A Class kids ever marched in the arena and we were able to choose to see all of the finals shows.

So here we are. Things have changed again. Just like television and technology. We grow and losteTriple Finals. We grow and lose the ageout tradition of leaving gloves on the floor. We grow and we lose the ability to make and watch video’s for years to come. We grow and many kids lose the arena. We may or may not get to see both finals ever again and that makes me sad, because many of us over the years have really tried to at least catch some of each of finals. That my friend is not a direction I’m willing to sit back and let happen.  In my vested interested in A class, it’s my job to advocate for a better system. I heard a lot of bitching this weekend. A lot! I heard a quote at the Nutter Center that just made me sad.

 “Well aren’t we the welfare children of WGI. Where is our block of cheese?”

Wow. Just wow. The benefit I have of being just a person in the stands and not sequestered or have special rooms at headquarters or attend private board meetings and have the cell number of important people, is that I get to listen and watch. I have the privilege as a writer of having people randomly talking to me. I watch and there is a feeling of us vs. them.  I don't get to sit like a queen on top of the arena watching finals. It is undeniable and as in all real change, at some point we will lose who we are and become who we will be. Let’s be careful though, because we don’t want to go down the path of major nonprofits, where we find out that the mission got lost in the quest for money…Red Cross, Salvation Army, Susan G. Coman, Untied Way. Their pocketbooks were hit hard from donations when the stories broke. 

And no. It wasn’t the same being at Nutter over the arena. It just wasn’t. They tried to sell that to us, but I know cow patties when I step in them. You know what would be amazing? Put World Class in the intimate environment of Nutter for Semi’s and I still bet the show would be packed as Semi’s would allow people to see the choreography up close and Saturday we could absorb the ambiance of the arena and A Class could have Friday night back. A and Open could even take turns on Friday nights. Just a thought. World could go back to Sunday's. The options are limitless if we try hard enough. If nothing else, for the love of God, let's figure out a way to get each finals a suitable audience for a world finalist.

My hope, because I always end with a hope. My hope is that those that feel disenfranchised will speak up. You know the best way to do it? With your dollars. Change occurs when you hit the pocketbooks of people in charge. It’s how we achieved social change in the civil rights movement and the gay rights movement. If you want change, you have to stop bitching and do something about it. You can’t let fear of debate or apathy stop you. Someone asked me this weekend if I was afraid my guard would be impacted by speaking out? I was like…WHAT! No of course not. One…I trust the judges. Two…if that ever happens I’m done. This is why I write. I want to keep tradition alive, dialog moving, and a future that involves all the voices.

I love winter guard. I love the people. I love my friends. I love my lifelong friends. I love headquarters. I love the arena. I love the shows. I love to know that I was around when there were Sunday shows and Triple finals. I love having the history. I love Al at the bar. I love Needmore Road that we make fun of every year. I love the tailgating at World Finals. I love the hugs in the halls. I love the standing ovations (all be it they are becoming less and less). I love the parties. I love the debates on the direction of World Class. I love that I hate that I’m tired for a week after WGI. I love the memories that carry me in the hard days of real life.  I love seeing my friend’s judge, work the shows, and walk on the floor with their guards. I love that there is such a bond between all of us, even when we are sometimes irritated and mad at each other. Mostly though, I love the traditions. Such as the oranges. You must eat a Dayton orange.

When I marched Pride we had a tradition of singing a song. “The Greatest Love of All.” There’s a line in it we must never forget.

“I believe the children are the future teach them well and let them lead the way.”

In the end, this picture below will get lost in a sea of Dayton's and 2016 will be a memory we will barely recall. The big scandal of the A Class NutterGate will be forgotten. All that will be left is a piece of confetti some young A Class performer picked up off the ground and tucked away in their memory box. We have to though, keep striving to make it better and reaching for different avenues of performance. We can't rush big decisions and have keep the mission always in our minds. We must listen to our instincts, lose our ego's, and include all the voices. It's not just about our future, but it's also about our traditions and our past, because without the past, we will lose the spirit. This is for all of us those that own a piece of confetti called the sport of the arts.